Along came the Travelift man
Who lifted us off of our stands
Now we�re doing our thing
Hanging from a sling
Like a trio of orangutans
Category Archives: Limericks
(#12)
When a barnacle comes Cayenne’s way
He’ll turn in disgust and dismay
Though he’ll try really hard
With our great Cop-r-gard
He cannot attach, come what may!
(#11)
The hull was so smooth and so fair
We said, “Let’s put some copper on there!”
Though he really was keen
Now poor Brian is GREEN
From the tips of his toes to his hair
#10 (a masterpiece from Margaret’s sister Julie)
I have a cool sister named Margaret
Who never bought clothes at a Target
To the Thrift store she’d go,
In the rain, sleet or snow.
Now she’s devoid of a house or a closet!
(#9)
Roses are red
Viruses suck
A Dell laptop
Makes a good hockeypuck.
(#8)
Upon trying to lift out the mast
Discovered that it was held fast
By some glue on the floor
Now to free it, for sure,
Would require a nuclear blast!
Millstone!
It’s a wonderful thing to have a tiny little black box that contains most of the information you need on a regular basis. A database full of names and addresses, a directory full of treasured childhood photos, another one of recent photos, hundreds of recipes, and copies of every letter you’ve typed in the past 15 years. And that’s without even connecting it to the Internet.
But with all that comes a price: Dependency. When the thing doesn’t boot up, you are toast. Without your to-do list in Excel, what do you DO next? Without the address book in Access, how can you call anyone? Without Microsoft Streets and Trips, how can you plan a trip across the country?
Our laptop, known as Fooney, was one hot computer. Too hot. You couldn’t use it in your lap without practically suffering thigh-burns. Eventually, some inner part decided that it didn’t like Fooney’s tropical climate and gave up the ghost.
Even though all the data was backed up before sending it in for repairs, the 7-10 days for the repair are actually going to adversely affect our travel schedule. Hence Fooney’s new name, “Millstone.”
I think it’s time to try some old-fashioned, computer-free camping. Where life is simple and uncomplicated, and the only bugs are the ones in your food.
(#7)
In a murky canal like a moat
A pair of green eyes seem to float
Now he’s fixing the skeg
‘Fraid of losing a leg
To a gator six feet from the boat
(#6)
While taking a drink in the shade
Dear Brian enjoys Gatorade
But taking a swig
Found a live roach THIS BIG
Now he’s mixing his cocktails with Raid!
(#5)
The magical seventy-four
Would shake the boat down to its core
But Bill’s only sixty
So it may be tricky
But it’s not a hurricane’s roar