Category Archives: Friends Along the Way

Please, honey?

8/12/2008 meps Leave a comment

So Parker says he wants a boat,
A place in the sunshine, afloat.
But Roxana’s not sure,
Whether sailing’s for her,
And hers is the critical vote.

I was on the way to the shower when I met a couple from Atlanta who were looking at boats on their 25th wedding anniversary. We hit it off and ended up chatting for quite a while, despite the fact that I was really, really, really grubby. I tried to stay downwind of them as we talked. I was that grubby.

Instead of singing in the shower, I write limericks. These five lines popped into my head during the shower that followed.

2011 Update:
I’ve really enjoyed exchanging emails with Roxana since that chance meeting. Finally, in January of 2011, almost 2-1/2 years after this limerick, she wrote that they had bought a boat:

“…Well, Parker (we, I guess) did it. A 2001 Island Packet 420 in Tortola. Yep. You read that right. I finally gave in.”

Roxana gave me the details of the great deal they got on the boat, but it was this paragraph that really made me smile:

“Seriously, it wasn’t the boat that changed my mind. When we went down for the sea trial we met one person after another, and every one of them was just wonderful. All were so warm and friendly, and very eager to help with anything. It was while I was sitting in a little outdoor restaurant waiting for Parker that I suddenly realized that, for me, it wasn’t really about the sailing or the boat. It was about the people! And so far, they have all exceeded my expectations!”

Friends Along the Way, Limericks, Messing About in Boats

Just-in-time shopping

8/9/2008 meps Leave a comment

I was thinking today, “Gee, we’re hosed,”
“It is Saturday, Bock’s shop is closed.”
When up came a roar,
From o’er near the store,
And out the ol’ Travelift nosed.

There were Randy and Kenny and Dale,
But the best part to tell of this tale,
Is how Nancy, Ms. Bock,
Had a tube of Life-Caulk,
That we found on the store shelf, for sale.

An advantage to having internet on the boat is that I can now pen limericks about events right when they happen. A disadvantage is that I can now pen these limericks about events that are critically exciting to us and distressingly boring to you, my gentle reader.

We are living in a region where gullywasher thunderstorms bring buckets of surprise, instantaneous rain. This makes a 20-inch hole in the deck a problem. Hence my joy at getting the new hatch installed today, rather than on Monday.

(Barry points out another disadvantage — that I can be wasting time writing these limericks instead of installing the hatch.)

Friends Along the Way, Limericks, Messing About in Boats

Third time’s the charm?

7/19/2008 meps Leave a comment

There once was a fellow named Dan,
Who lived on a boat on jackstands.
“She leaks like a sieve,
But it’s no way to live,
I would much rather float, if I can.”

Our neighbor, Dan, has been launched twice and subsequently pulled out. Somehow, he keeps a cheerful attitude, despite the delays. His blog is at www.danzplan.com.

“Like a sieve” is my poetic license; his boat is really nice. But if it worked perfectly, we wouldn’t have met him in the boatyard!

Friends Along the Way, Limericks, Messing About in Boats

One less guy to flirt with

7/7/2008 meps Leave a comment

There once was a fellow named Larry,
Who, when asked if he’s happy, says, “Very!”
After many a year,
His old high school dear,
Has accepted his offer to marry.

==
Larry is one of my favorite guys here at Bock Marine, and he’s just returned from his honeymoon. Congratulations to the new couple!

Friends Along the Way, Limericks, Messing About in Boats

Heat wave for sale, cheap

6/6/2008 meps Leave a comment

I am wishing this heat wave would end,
But my far-flung friends don’t comprehend.
Candy says, “Chile’s chilly!”
Nita says, “Fifties, really!”
So I’ll just attach heat and click SEND.

We had to flee the melting heat, so we ducked into an air-conditioned library. While there, two emails came in, one from South America and one from Seattle. Both were complaining about how cold it is, and despite glares from the librarians, we couldn’t stop laughing.

2008 The Other Half of a North American Circumnavigation, Friends Along the Way, Limericks

Limerixty-six, for Harley and Annabelle

4/22/2008 meps Leave a comment

At a shop that is on Sixty-Six,
They once sold guitar strings and picks,
Now they entertain gaily,
The crowds that come daily,
To hear them and get some good “kicks!”

You can get your kicks, too, at the Sandhills Curiosity Shop on old Route 66 in Erick, Oklahoma. Or, if you can’t get there, take a look at some of the videos.

2008 The Other Half of a North American Circumnavigation, Friends Along the Way, Limericks

Silly horny lizard

4/12/2008 meps Leave a comment

Says Bonnie, “My Iggie won’t bite.”
But I’m still afraid that he might–
She says he’s in heat.
(Will he nip my feet,
Because my red toenails excite?)

Iggie is a 4-1/2 foot long iguana. He’s currently in heat and attracted to women of any species.

Awfully Funny, Friends Along the Way

Wikipedia, you got some ‘splainin’ to do!

10/11/2007 meps Leave a comment

Letter to a Gullible Friend

Dear Gullible Friend,

Yesterday, I talked with a friend who was reading about the “I Love Lucy” show on the Internet. Why she was searching for “I Love Lucy,” I don’t know, but it might be related to the fact that, like yours truly, this friend is currently unencumbered by the employment process.

She found an article on Wikipedia that answered her Lucy questions, but it also left her puzzled and confused. According to Wikipedia, there was a pornographic version of the “I Love Lucy” show, called “I Love Lucy All Over.” My friend asked, “Isn’t that amazing? But don’t you think we would have heard of it, if it’s really true?”

When she found the page, she bookmarked it, so she could show it to her husband when he returned home that evening.

You can imagine what happened. The page came up, with no reference to Lucille Ball and Desi Arnaz’s pornographic films. And her husband thought she was crazy.

My friend isn’t crazy. The problem is with Wikipedia.

A Wiki is a web page that can be edited, at any time, by any person. As Barry says, “Any idiot could write an article for Wikipedia.” It’s very susceptible to vandalism.

A couple of years ago, a friend of my father’s, John Seigenthaler, discovered a biography of himself on Wikipedia that he says amounted to “Internet character assassination.” The article said, “John Seigenthaler Sr. was the assistant to Attorney General Robert Kennedy in the early 1960’s. For a brief time, he was thought to have been directly involved in the Kennedy assassinations of both John, and his brother, Bobby. Nothing was ever proven.”

For this close friend of Bobby Kennedy, such an accusation was sick, false, and malicious.

Seigenthaler discovered that he had little recourse. Wikipedia removed the entry, but other sites, such as Answers.com and Reference.com had already copied the spurious entry and were touting it as fact. Wikipedia and BellSouth, whose anonymous user had posted the entry, were immune to a libel suit over the matter.

Being a moderately famous retired newspaper editor, Seigenthaler raised a hue and cry in USA Today. Wikipedia and BellSouth didn’t lift a finger to help, but an internet activist named Daniel Brandt, who takes on outfits like Wikipedia and Google, used the IP address to trace the article to its source. The guy who wrote the false article admitted that it was a joke, saying that he didn’t think people took Wikipedia seriously. He apologized, and he lost his job.

The lesson here is not to wish Wikipedia was more reliable. The lesson, my gullible friend, is to take Wikipedia — and the web in general — at face value:

It’s entertainment.
Some of it is true.
Some of it is not true.
It publishes information that gets picked up by other sites, who think it’s all true.

Luckily for my friend, Barry showed us where old versions of Wikipedia can be found in the history section of the site. The entry on “I Love Lucy All Over” is here: http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=I_Love_Lucy&oldid=163671874

As Barry said, “You weren’t crazy — you really did read it. You were gullible, however if you believed it And if you went looking to buy the DVD on Amazon afterwards, you were REALLY gullible!

“Have fun, and don’t believe everything you read on the internet!”

This article was not reviewed or edited by anyone other than Meps and Barry. Reliable sources included USA Today, the New York Times, and the BBC.

Unreliable sources included Wikipedia.

Entertainment provided by the Uncyclopedia, the Content-Free Encyclopedia.

Birthday Limericks, Friends Along the Way, Limericks

Ode to a teetotaller’s birthday

10/11/2007 meps Leave a comment

I have known Dave for twenty-five years,
Though we’ve never shared whiskey or beers.
He’s a fine upright friend,
And this poem I send,
As I raise up my Coke and say, “Cheers!”

Birthday Limericks, Friends Along the Way, Limericks

Zero to sixty in sixty years

10/8/2007 meps Leave a comment

“I missed it!” I cried out, aghast.
The birthday of Craig has just passed.
Though he’s now six-zero,
The man is my hero,
‘Cause parties with him are a blast.

This one’s for Captain Craig, Scourge of Lake Union and Environs. The notorious Craig was celebrated in an earlier Mepsnbarry Adventure, That’s Me in the Monkey Mask.